Crazy In Love

by Anita S. Lane

Ms. Beyoncé Knowles may have coined the phrase, but I’m not sure she’ll truly understand what it means to be “Crazy in Love” until she’s married with children.

It all starts when they’re born. You no longer get any sleep. That alone will make you crazy. Then you barely have time in between feedings to feed yourself. That will definitely cause you to want to act crazy. And forget perfect hair and manicured nails…

Chorus, please:
Got me lookin so crazy right now
Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now

Before long, you find yourself telling your colleagues, “I’ll see you later, I’m going bye-bye.” Sound improbable? It really happened to me. Fortunately, I had wonderful colleagues that were forgiving of my momentary lapse in office decorum.

But it doesn’t stop there. If you manage to add two or three more children to your young brood, just getting out of the house becomes a major production and inevitably, everyone manages to leave the house looking a little more put together than you.

Tennis shoes, don't even need to buy a new dress
…Ain't nobody else to impress

And when they’re old enough to begin sporting and recreational activities, you’ve entered an entirely different league. I spent four days traveling across town trying to find a tap dance class for my daughter that fit into our schedule. I’m careful to not overbook, but just the search process alone was daunting.

Yeah, cause i know i don't understand
Just how your love can [make me] do what no on else can

Dance School #1 was simply further than I wanted to drive.
Dance School #2 only offered tap during the children’s church choir rehearsal.
Dance School #3 was a fit! But wait…recitals are only offered every other year?
“Mom, I have to have a recital so that everyone can see my dance.”
“Great,” I said. Now on to dance school #4.

Chorus, please:
Got me lookin so crazy right now
Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now

Dance School #4—Sure enough, we hit another brick wall. Except… this school offered a kid’s hip hop class on Saturday afternoon.
“Hip Hop? I love hip hop, Mom. I really want to take that!” Finally, we found our dance. Just when I was beginning to feel a little…you guessed it—

Sing with me...
Got me lookin so crazy right now
Your love's got me lookin so crazy right now

It’s been said that love will make you do crazy things. I guess I’m guilty of having done a few crazy things, looking a little crazy in order to get-out-of-the-house on time, and even going to great lengths to find just the right dance class for my daughter.

I can’t say that it’s right or even necessary. All I know is that it’s something about these four little blessings that makes me want to jump through hoops and leap over walls. Perhaps its hyper-parenting, or maternal instinct gone bad. Or maybe it’s just plain crazy.

Yeah...that’s it. Beyoncé isn’t the only one Crazy In Love.

Copyright ©2006 by Anita S. Lane

Visit my online family magazine http://keepingfamilyfirst.org

A Valentine to My Love...

Real Good Love
by Anita S. Lane

So this is love…Real love. My husband was leaving for work one morning and as he descended down the stairs I found myself humming the tune of Aretha Franklin’s legendary song, “A Natural Woman.” What? Why am I singing this song? It is definitely not my typical choice of morning, quiet-time selections. But I went with it. I didn’t even know I knew the words—or at least the chorus—but I did. Then it became clear why that song came to mind.

On that morning, I realized something. I felt alive. Real love makes you feel alive.

Don’t think that feelings don’t matter in marriage. What two individuals get married simply because they know intellectually that they love each other? (Outside of an arranged marriage, of course). In most instances, individuals are motivated to get married because they feel love. He says, “I love you.” She says, “I love you” and they feel it. They feel it in their souls. They feel it in their hearts. They sense it in the touch and hear it in the sound of each other’s voices. This is love. They know it and they feel it—enough to walk down the isle and jump the broom into marital bliss.

However, many times after years of marriage the love we once “felt” gives way to a love we merely know in our hearts. And while knowing in our hearts that our spouse loves us is essential, feeling it is what keeps the marital embers burning.

Feeling the love is what helps you ward off the temptation to get involved with another man or woman. Feeling the love is what helps give you the emotional strength (plus a few endorphins) to endure the hard times in marriage. Granted, no matter what you feel, marriage is a commitment and one promises to be true regardless. But a few positive feelings can really help along the way.

We are first of all spiritual beings, but we are also emotional and physical beings as well. That’s why good communication and good sex are also critical to a successful marriage. No marriage is perfect and no successful marriage is accomplished without effort. But when use your time, energy and resources (effort) in preventative measures—to really love and demonstrate love—then you will spend a lot less effort on reconstructive measures attempting to rebuild a marriage that has come undone. And believe me, it’s worth the effort.

Good love makes you feel alive. That one morning as my husband descended down the stairs to leave for work I realized that I truly felt alive. God is my source and my womanhood is in Him. But my husband enhances my womanhood. He builds me up in my efforts to be the woman God is calling me to be. He’s still the most handsome guy I know. I still blush when he flashes that debonair smile and my face still lights up when he enters a room…

Oh, baby, what you've done to me
You make me feel so good inside
And I just want to be
Close to you, you make me feel so alive
Cause you make me feel
You make me feel
You make me feel like a natural woman...

I am free to soar because of the unconditional love of a really good God and the real good love of my man.

Recommended Reading:
“The Five Love Languages,” by Gary Chapman
"Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately"Needs," by E. Eggerichs
Visit our Bookviews page at http://keepingfamilyfirst.org/bookviews.html

Copyright ©2006 by Anita S. Lane
Visit my online family magazine
http://keepingfamilyfirst.org

Secularization and Globalization: The Diminishing of an American Super Power

by Anita S. Lane

America is a super power because it was founded on the empowering principles of freedom and self determination—principles that emanate from the Judeo-Christian faith perspective. God created us in His likeness. God is free. Therefore we are free. God Himself will not preempt our will—whether it be good or evil.

Traditionally, America has acknowledged that the incredibly wonderful privilege of freedom comes from our creator, God. As a result of our acknowledgement of and dependence upon divine providence, we have enjoyed the benefits of unbridled creativity and the liberty to pursue one’s dreams.

One might contend that the wealth of this country has little to do with Christian values and more to do with the reality that the wealth of this nation was built on the backs of slaves—a horrible institution promulgated by the founding fathers. Could God have really been blessing this country in the midst of such a pervasive, evil vice, or were we just blessing ourselves with the profits from free slave labor? If we merely blessed ourselves, that evil seed would surely return to visit us in the form of a tempestuous harvest of destruction.

I submit to you that God did not bless America because of greedy, capitalistic, murderous individuals, but in spite of them. To the benefit of all in this country, there has always been a righteous remnant—a minority of people who keep the faith in earnest, people who love God and hate injustice. People who are willing to fight for the rights afforded to every human by God, and who are willing to die—as did Jesus—so that others can live free.

These are the people—not the corrupt, greed mongers—for whom God blessed America. The tradition of blessing the many because of the few is clearly laid out in scripture. Abraham pleaded with God to preserve Sodom and Gomorrah if there were only 10 righteous. God agreed. Unfortunately, Abraham stopped asking at 10, and there were not ten righteous. Scripture tells us that the prayers of the righteous avail much. God hears and answers the prayers of the righteous. The scripture also tells us that faith without works is dead. So these same people put action to their words and preached against slavery. They fought in the civil war. They walked alongside their African-American brothers and sister and pursued the cause of freedom and justice—even to their own physical, political and social demise. The Quakers,and members of the American Anti-Slavery Society were such individuals.

Now, over three hundred years since the establishment of this country, we are far less homogeneous. Many millions more have landed on our shores—bringing with them many more belief systems. And in addition to diversifying our faith base, each new generation of Americans seems to have forgotten the “faith or our fathers” and are far less likely to acknowledge God or His involvement in the affairs of men.

Thus, there is a correlation between the secularization of America and the globalization of America. The less value we give to our inalienable God-given rights, the more susceptible we become to the globalization of our values and ultimately—of America.

We are created by a sovereign God and we must remain a sovereign nation. Globalism on the other hand—sometimes referred to as Elitism, Internationalism, World Federalism, One World Order or the New World Order—is an ideology that strips individuals of their rights and countries of their sovereignty.

Founded on the premise that we have God-given inalienable rights, America’s founding fathers could not have imagined that America would evolve into a nation of people who “know not their God” and don’t even acknowledge Him. Yet, this is what is happening to America in small, bite-size increments. It is God’s will that His people are free. And when we lose sight of God, we lose sight of His will. If we no longer realize it is God’s divine will that we be free to fully govern ourselves and not be subject to outside rule, then we will become subject to such rule.

Wait…does this seem the least bit familiar? Beginning in the 1600's, Puritans began fleeing Europe in search of religious and political freedom. Today, with the creation of the Eastern Union, Britain is already seeing the horrifying effects of globalization. 80% of their laws are now made by the union and not by Britain itself.

If America does not resist the secularization of our values we will succumb to the globalization of our nation. If we don’t rise up to fight for our God-given rights, we may end up wishing we could flee to greener pastures. But there will be no where to go.

Copyright ©2006 by Anita S. Lane
Visit my online family magazine
http://keepingfamilyfirst.org/

A Call to Pure Religion

by Anita S. Lane

James 1:27 says, “Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.” The scripture continues in verse one of chapter two by saying, “have not respect of persons…” Or in today’s language, “Don’t even say you have the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ—the Lord of glory—and then go and show respect of persons. In no way is that God."

How can this be the most fundamental element of religion? Wouldn’t the purest form of religion consist of introducing lost souls to Christ?

I think what James understood and wanted to communicate—which is also what Jesus understood and communicated—is that in order to reach people, you must first meet them; meet them right where they are. Don’t expect or ask them to come to you, but you go to them. You, the big, bad religious giant that you are—humble yourself, strip yourself of all piety as Jesus did, and meet them, so that you can reach them.

Why is it pure and undefiled to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction? Because they don’t have a platform upon which to proclaim to the world what you have done for them. What you have done will be done in anonymity and it won’t make the society pages—unless you take your personal film crew with you. Giving to the fatherless and widowed is pure because they don’t have anything to offer you in return. You are not giving in expectation of political favors or kickbacks. You’re giving because the need is there and the compassion of your savior on the inside of you is compelling you to give.

The scripture says that when Jesus looked upon the people, He was moved with compassion, for they were as sheep having no Shepard. What do we see when we look upon the people of our world today? Are we moved with compassion or are we moved to change the channel, or put down the newspaper and think on something more pleasant?

To have compassion is more than to have pity on someone. Compassion means a “Deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it.” (American Heritage Dictionary. Fourth Edition ©2000). Perhaps we are just too desensitized because of all the media images of suffering that are displayed across the airways. Perhaps we feel that there are too many social ills and we just throw up our hands in despair. However, that is not what Jesus did.

In Matthew 25 Jesus is telling a parable and concludes with the statement, “Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.” In essence, He’s saying, “When you help those who are downtrodden, disenfranchised, marginalized and institutionalized, you’re doing something for me. That’s when you start speaking my language and pulling my heart strings. That’s why I came. Everyone was at one time broken, blind and in despair, separated from an intimate love relationship with our heavenly father, and that’s why I came. You see, I see you no differently than I see the orphan child or the widow. I have no respect of persons.”

Pure religion is about identifying a need and meeting it. Using your God-given mind, will, emotions, time, and resources to helping to others—and helping without expecting anything in return. I know many people who have traveled to Africa on medical and Christian missions. In spite of the health risks, and without Oprah’s cameras rolling, they go into towns and villages to help save lives—both physically and spiritually. That is pure religion.

All of the individuals who gave their hard earned money and utilized their resources to go down to the gulf coast after Hurricane Katrina to help—that’s pure religion.

To every volunteer and staff person at non-profit, youth and family-serving organizations who sacrifice larger pay checks and social status to commit to the cause of enhancing the lives of children and families, and building stronger communities—that’s pure religion.

To every layperson and minister who pays that weekly visit to the elderly in the nursing home or the woman or man in the prison—just to show that someone still cares—that’s pure religion.

…And to keep himself unspotted from the world. That’s the second aspect of “pure religion.” And just what does that mean? Well, it doesn’t mean don’t allow people in the world to touch you and spot up your crisp, clean clothes. No. In I John 2:15-17, the scripture says, 16For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. 17And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

That’s the “world” that John is admonishing us to not become spotted by. It’s the world that is in us. The world that operates in our mindset—our worldly way of thinking. And unfortunately, too many of us have succumb to the world’s way of thinking. We have yielded to the world’s fleshly lusts, the world’s lusts of the eyes and the pride of life. We want what the world wants and often (although unwilling to admit it) we’re willing to operate as the world does to get what we want. We live for ourselves and we only give if it’s in some way going to benefit us. That’s being spotted. That’s what God doesn’t want us to do.

This is a call to pure religion. A religion where in the 21st century speed-of-light society, we must slow down, pay attention and take time for those who are suffering around us. Only if we slow down and pay attention can we be moved with compassion, which leads to action. And effective action leads to change. And change is something we all want. We want our families to change, our schools to change, our communities to change, our younger generation to change, our elected leadership to change, our media to change… The only way we will get change is if we make the change to get involved in the lives of others and in causes greater than ourselves. Your one act of kindness can inspire another, who in turn makes a change—which inspires another, who in turn makes a change—which inspires another. And then we’ll see change manifest in America.

This is pure religion. Live it. Reproduce it.

Copyright ©2006 by Anita S. Lane
Visit my online family magazine http://keepingfamilyfirst.org